July Collab

Topic#2: Struggles on the Path We all have times of inner conflict when it comes to our spiritual path. We change, we explore, we learn. Talk about how your spiritual path is going. Have you had any struggles that have been particularly important to you in getting where you are? Share how you got through the tough times and what it taught you. Do you think there will be ever a moment when we will just get it and no longer be seeking? My path has had its ups and downs. It seems like it is always more in a downward trend than an upward one. I can blame it on all kinds of factors, but the basic truth is within me and the fact that I am not making the difference I need to be making. In other words, I am not seriously looking for a place to hold my rituals and that is the only thing that is keeping me back. I guess I am scared, in a way, that I will find this great place, and someone will find me there. OR I am just lazy and don’t want to have to leave my home in order to perform rituals. I mean, driving someplace to do it just isn’t my favorite thing in the world. I liked being able to walk, but I don’t think I could find any place nearby that would be safe. I know, I know, excuses excuses.

I guess, one thing, is that when I finally DO do a ritual, it has more meaning and more power because it has been so long in between. IF that makes any sense…

Will there ever be a time when I will “get it” and no longer have to seek? I doubt it. To me it is a constantly growing and changing belief. There are always new things to learn or seek.

Tough times. Well, it seems like there has always been tough times. I keep saying that someday I will have a place where I can consistently hold rituals. Someday. Who really knows when. If I wasn’t so worried about neighbors.. Hell, I *used * to have a fence, but it was one of those every other board fences.. could still see through, but now, since the wind storm last spring blew down a section, the landlord decided to remove the entire fence. *sigh*

See? Like I said, always an excuse.

It’s not like my beliefs have changed. No, I still proudly love the Goddess, the moon and everything she stands for. I still feel a closeness, but now that closeness is marred by what used to be. The rituals. The drawing down. It’s no longer with me, and it is truly my own fault. I’m not sure what I need to make it happen. To make me whole again, because I really feel that I’m not complete without worshipping at least once a month.

A friend of mine said that she doesn’t feel right doing rituals. That it is just in the heart and soul of a person, rather than in the means of expressing it. BUT I doubt she has ever felt the power that I’ve felt during ritual.

Soon….

Blessed Be!